Hey everyone I am back and super excited to be back up and blogging. I have been in treatment for a little over 2 weeks, in Wickenburg, Arizona. Very cold in the morning and night and hot during the day, sounds like Florida in the winter right?
I am not going to say treatment has not been tough, it has been extremely hard, tiring and emotiona; but I am getting through it and each day I improve more and more! We are required to say daily affirmations, my favorite ones to say are : I am beautiful no matter my size, my body does not define me, I deserve recovery, I am a strong and confident women, and I am beautiful. Sometimes I will say an affirmation I don't like but something I would like to believe in.
"Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, he turned into a butterfly..."
What this means to me is: When times get real bad we loose all things we believe in,
and it takes a spirtual awakening to make things better!
12 step recovery meetings mean a lot to me, they help me find hope, strenght, serenity, inner peace, belief in good. The ability to meet new people and make friends. It doesn't matter what fellowship your in they are all amazing, and I know for me I can take something out of each meeting I go to!
Two books I am currently reading are :
Life without Ed- http://www.amazon.com/Life-Without-Ed-Declared-Independence/dp/0071422986/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1328680336&sr=8-1
The Borderline and The Buddha- http://www.amazon.com/Buddha-Borderline-Recovery-Personality-Dialectical/dp/157224710X/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1328680359&sr=1-1
........ Both are extremely good, and I can't put them down, they are recovery oriented.
I love to journal. i hace filled 75% of my big journal since Jan 1. That is less than 2 months. I just have so much to right!!! Love it.. I do a daily feelings checkin on what I'm feeling in all there areas: Anger, fear, pain, shame. guily, joy, passion, love! It's great, an awesome way to pray to G-d. IT helps me a ton, and I reccomend everyone to give it a try. Oh, and Soduku helps as well but it can either relieve anxiety or make it worse.
Some cool things I have done here in recovery is Equine Therapy, we had to get "Rosie" the horse to run through a barrel object in the middle of the field area. I was the one that had to guide her, trick is we couldn't talk at all between each other or the horse. It was really cool. The concept was that we have to get over our own obsticles to get better!
Another actitivity we do is Ropes Course, every friday afternoon! It always starts off with something fun for instance we did the abc's an with each letter said we had to do a movent whether it be sport or fitness oriented, it was a BLAST.. The real challenges are for instance, we all had to stand on a log, then we had to make everyone from tallest to shortest. Rules: no talkin ot getting off log, but we did have the support of a few people who had decided not to do the challenge.
As well we have YOGA, and I am actually enjoying it and may do it once a week at home, it is extremely helpful!
The program where I am at is phenomenal and I know that I am definitely at the rice place!
One assignment we had to do was pick out 3 things, they meant the following in this order:
Childhood- My girl- The tempatsions
In disease- The Voice Within; Christina Aguilera
Recovery Life- For Good; wicked musical soundtrack
I think for the most part all these songs and timings are perfect or me.
Here is a poem that was read and I wanted to share it, because it meant a lot to me:
Mother Teresa's Anyway Poem
People are often unreasonable, illogical and self centered;
Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies;
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;
Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;
Give the world the best you've got anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and your God;
It was never between you and them anyway.
Isn't that beautiful, I think we should all live our lives like this!!
Hope you enjoyed my blog!!!
" Get busy living, or get busy dying!"